I’m not sure if you’ve ever ridden in a car with a toddler, but let me tell you, the conversation is always interesting.

As the parent in the car, sometimes it is tempting to get pulled into every conversation, turned argument, turned lamentation. However, something my husband and I have learned, is that at some point, we just have to stop responding.

Take this evening for example. We went to the Linn football game. While at the game, our children were actually great! They had activities in a backpack to keep them occupied and were minimally crabby, even after we passed my youngest’s bedtime. My little loves were just enjoying the time with family outdoors.

As soon as we decided that it was time to leave, my youngest was so ready to go, she was about to leave all of us behind. From a parenting perspective, I appreciated her readiness and ambition, however, it really isn’t a good reflection on a parent when an 18+ month old starts walking off on her own.

My son chose the opposite route. In fact, he wasn’t so much bothered by leaving the football game, but was upset when he found out that bed was the next step when he arrived home. “Can’t I just stay up for a little bit longer?”

The answer was no, and after saying “No,” in as many direct and creative ways as I could, after explaining in great detail why he had to go straight to bed when he got home, and trying my best to ensure he felt heard, my husband and I instituted the silent treatment.

Now, don’t shame me as a parent yet, it isn’t the silent treatment in the traditional sense of the phrase. It was more like, “We will no longer be responding to or participating in THIS conversation.” We were welcoming to any other topic, but couldn’t be clearer that the answer was absolutely not going to change.

When I thought about this parenting strategy, I wondered if that is what God feels like sometimes. We are the toddler in the backseat absolutely PLEADING for something and God has given answers to us left and right that we ignored. We continue to plead and He just remains silent for a while on the topic because His answer was clear, we just didn’t want to hear it.

I also wondered if God simply doesn’t respond to our prayers sometimes because of how ridiculous we sound, unbeknownst to us. In my mind, this looks like when my son and daughter are sitting in the backseat blowing raspberries and shouting words or phrases that make no sense in context.

No seriously, tonight my son gave me an entire 2 minute monologue comprised of the word, “Bottle,” at varying volumes.

I didn’t have a response to that, obviously, so I shook my head and smiled.

I wonder how often God just shakes His head and smiles at our prayers and our daily adventures.

But what is so interesting to me, is that in those moments that my kids are saying something that is, in my mind, rhetorical, they get so upset when they feel they aren’t being heard…

Does that sound familiar or what? I know people who have abandoned their faith entirely over feeling as if “no one was listening” when they were praying. But the real question is, were THEY listening?

In my experience, and honestly, maybe it isn’t a lot, God isn’t always going to kick you in the pants to get His answer across. In fact, I think most of the time, His answers are subtle and meant for us to slow down and study like pieces to a jigsaw puzzle.

Something that has been heavy on my heart and mind lately has been my ministry with God. What is my calling? How can I use the talents and gifts God has given me to glorify Him? And when I do figure that out, how can I possibly make time to do it while working full-time and raising a family?

While I don’t think these questions are out of line, I think the bigger issue is the steps I’m trying to skip to get to the answer.

God has given me answers in HIS time through everything in my life so far, why should now be any different?

I was reminded by someone this evening, whom I’ve asked for some mentorship, that it will always happen in His perfect timing. We as Christians believe that! So we need to trust that, no matter how painful or difficult waiting might seem, God’s plan is always going to be bigger and better than anything we could ever imagine.

That same mentor reminded me that God is a great teacher. He doesn’t just throw you into something you don’t understand, at least not often. Most of the time, He teaches you all the skills you need to do His work before putting you in a direct position to do it.

She used the example of Noah and the Ark. Everyone remembers that Noah built the ark at God’s command, but it’s often forgotten all that Noah learned and did prior to God’s request of Him to build the ark - learning carpentry, craftsmanship, building his faith, etc.

This was a fantastic reminder of God’s polishing process and the phrase, “He prepares you for what He prepares for you.” Two things I regularly try to keep in mind. I am so grateful that God brought her into my life by way of my job. I’ve only had a couple conversations with her, but her wisdom and willingness to be a vessel is incredible, inspiring, and admirable.

But her wise advice lead me to this answer after my pondering in the car on the ride home: sometimes God’s answer is silence. That silence doesn’t mean, “yes,” “no,” or “maybe,” it is simply silence. There are lots of things that the silence COULD mean, but at the end of the day, God does hear you.

One of my favorite worship songs, “Yes I Will,” by Vertical Worship, has a lyric that sticks in my mind in times like this. “In the waiting, the same God who’s never late, is working all things out.”

Don’t give up just because you don’t hear Him now. You never know, maybe tomorrow your answer will come!